Culinary assault!

A woman raped her sisters with food:

A woman has opened up about how she used smoothies to fatten up her bridesmaids before her wedding day. Penny says she made a special smoothie for her sisters, who would be bridesmaids at her wedding, every morning. They never knew what was in it or that the intention was to make them fat.

Damn.

"By the time my wedding rolled around, each of my sisters had to have their dress altered to accommodate their thickening waistlines."

Such is the mentality of mediocre humans: ruin others to make yourself look better.


Layers of stupidity and errors

MPAI: Most People Are Idiots. One might think that, at least, the pilot of an aircraft wouldn't be in that category but alas:

Many accidents occur in which the crew do everything right while the aircraft crashes and nobody survives. Here, the pilot made sure to ignore protocol and do almost everything wrong, killing over a hundred people in the asinine process. Air-bus, indeed.


Brutally battered

Fiona Simpson, 23, was driving on the highway with her four-month-old daughter Clara and her 78-year-old grandmother when the group was caught in the powerful storm.

Simpson told the Australian Broadcasting Corporation she pulled over and thought to wait out the storm. But the car was not up to the task of the sheltering the family, and large hail began smashing the windows, spurring Simpson to leap to the backseat and try to shield her daughter from harm.

The photos are unbelievable. It's shocking to note that she was in her car the whole time while the hail did that much damage to her body.


So close to carnage

A mere one second delay would have resulted in the deaths of hundreds:

Air Canada’s near miss at the San Francisco International Airport last year could have resulted in a catastrophic outcome, according to the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB). [...]

Air Canada flight 759, an Airbus A-320, was cleared to land on a runway, but the plane lined up on a parallel taxiway, which had four airplanes on it awaiting takeoff clearance.

Here's the video:

The Air Canada flight almost ripped off the vertical stabilizer of one of the planes. I can't imagine the horror of the pilots on the ground.


Condom! Condom!

Ever wonder what Canadians would do for some dirt-cheap corn? One clip might give you an idea.

Yeah, these "Canadians" sure are a rowdy bunch. Though, it's strange how none of them are speaking English or French.

According to an online flyer, the store was offering a sale on sweet corn over the Labour Day weekend: 12 ears of corn for $1.68.

The local grocery store had them for $0.15 each last month. So, that would be 12 ears of corn for $1.80. Get out of the way, old Asian man! That's some serious savings of $0.22!


Darwin Award ... almost

A 12-year-old girl from Detroit is in the hospital recovering from severe burns after taking part in a disturbing trend called the Fire Challenge.

[...] Brandi rushed Timiyah to the hospital as the other girls admitted, they were taking the fire challenge -- something one of the girls had seen on YouTube where you douse yourself with rubbing alcohol and set yourself on fire.

How dysfunctional do your synapses have to be when you come to the conclusion that setting yourself on fire is reasonable


Not too hot

I've noticed hot girls who are smitten with young but not-so-stunning guys. That's confusing -- not any more, thanks to Vox Day:

Being in the top one percent of intelligence myself, and having been friends with a male Calvin Klein model, I can attest that as far as women are concerned, there can definitely be too much of a good thing. I remember one very attractive girl who was - to my point of view, inexplicably - focusing her attention on me rather on than my much better-looking friend explaining that she wanted to be the pretty one in the relationship.

Ah, makes sense! That's another simple difference between the sexes. A man who ignored or rejected hot women because he wished to be the pretty one in a relationship would be rightly viewed as mildly retarded.


The noble savages

It's amusing when colored people complain about the horrible racist America or the vicious intolerant West. Try spending a few weeks in the Arab world and experience life among the enlightened Muslims:

In an attempt to capitalize on what's become a ratings bonanza for Arabic satellite channels during the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, two comedies struck the wrong chord with audiences when their lead actors appeared in blackface.

Criticism was swift on social media, but failed to trigger a deeper discussion on racism in the Middle East.

The shows - one produced in Egypt and the other in Kuwait - also poked fun at Sudanese culture, making a mockery of the Sudanese Arabic dialect and portraying darker skinned people from Sudan as either poor or lazy.


Baloo goes berserk

The Last Selfie:

A man was mauled to death by a bear after he reportedly tried to take a selfie with the creature.

After stopping to go to the toilet on his way home from a wedding, Prabhu Bhatara is said to have spotted the injured animal in the Nabarangpur district of Odisha in India.

His fellow SUV passengers advised him against trying to take a picture with the creature.

There is no cure for stupid.


Moth angry at flame

Roaming chimes in:


A short life

A Calgary toddler who died after being left alone in a car seat in a closet for five hours was likely "trying to get out" when she became entangled in the straps, a court was told Monday.

That sentence made little sense upon first reading.

Ceira and her twin brother — who was likely left in a playpen for most of the day — were dropped off at 7:15 a.m. by their father on Nov. 12, 2015.

Even though Simons had been asked not to allow the children a morning nap, she put the toddler in the baby seat around 8 a.m. MT and left to run errands.

That's right. The parents who apparently love their children so much that they repeatedly left them with Elmarie Simons for the whole day. Simons who is also a very caring person decided to go shopping while leaving the toddlers behind. Simons basically tied up a young, helpless girl and left her in a closet for five hours. Now, she's dead.

At least she was very loved.


Totally haram!

Russians cast off the gloom from the new Cold War with the West with a record-breaking descent in swimwear. Some 1,525 revellers stripped to bikinis and bathing shorts despite temperatures of only 5C in the spring sunshine of the Siberian resort of Sheregesh.

Skiers and snowboarders marked the end of the winter season by beating their own previous Russian record for the near naked descent.

Feminists and Muslims are triggered!

A poor, oppressed woman:

Crazy infidel girl

Horrible. Just horrible.


So delicate, so fragile

A supermarket is to introduce touch-free packaging to help squeamish millennials who are afraid to touch raw meat before cooking it.

Not from The Onion:

“Customers, particularly younger ones, are quite scared of touching raw meat," Katherine Hall, product development manager for meat, fish and poultry at the retailer, told The Sunday Times.

"These bags allow people, especially those who are time-poor, to just ‘rip and tip’ the meat straight into the frying pan without touching it.”

Generation Pussy.

A recent report by Mintel, the consumer research firm, found just under 40pc of young cooks prefer not to handle raw meat, compared with a little more than a quarter of the broader population.

What? Cooks who don't want to deal with raw meat!? That's like a surgeon who can't handle the sight of blood.


A devastating accident

The Tobins sat at a bedside vigil with a boy they thought was their son. The Labelles were mourning the son they thought they'd lost. In a town wrenched by grief, an identification mistake is just one more heartbreaking blow.

I initially thought that the hospital had made a really dumb mistake. Then, I quickly realized the full horror: the guy was unrecognizable because he was so badly mangled!

He said the family was told Parker had severe injuries, including a broken hip and “a big gash on the top of his head that runs from his forehead right back to the end of his head,” which “went right to the bone.”


Leave lions alone

This shocking footage shows the moment when a lion attacks a young girl in Saudi Arabia after dozens of children were allowed to play with the predator during a festival.

The video sees the children run around with the lion, when suddenly the game turns into a serious hunt for the wild animal, and it pounces on one of the children.

Just how low of an IQ does one need to have to think that allowing children to "play" with an efficient killing machine is a good idea? This isn't the fault of one idiot. A political authority, festival organizers, and the parents were all in favor of this lunacy.


Han Solo of Bangladesh

Maybe, he didn't understand the nuances of the mile high club?

A passenger on a flight from Malaysia has been arrested after reportedly stripping naked to watch porn before attacking a stewardess.

Shortly after the Malindo Air flight departed from Kuala Lumpur on Saturday, the 20-year-old Bangladeshi took his clothes off and started watching pornography on his laptop, local media reported.

More:

According to Malaysian website Star Online, the man also masturbated and urinated on his seat.

Was he on drugs?


"Chopstick grip"

No love for the alien:

If the hoverhand is the physical expression of a beta male feeling anxious and uncomfortable in the presence of a hot chick, worried she might reject him if his hand were to find purchase on her shirt sleeve, then the Chopstick Grip is the physical expression of a girl who is too repulsed by her husband to make full palm contact with his scaly back.

Plus, she's leaning back, away from the Zucks.


Just the facts

If you were curious about the Canadians and Brits: