Under orders from the Supreme Chancellor of the People's Republic of Canada Justin Trudeau, all bank ATMs across the provinces will now require anyone attempting to withdraw money from their accounts to take a small quiz on their political beliefs.
"Let me be perfectly clear," said Trudeau while standing in a puddle of his own urine. "Those with unacceptable views shouldn't have money. These evil working-class people being allowed to buy things and eat is a threat to public safety and national security. Starting today, all ATMs will screen people for unacceptable views before they can withdraw funds."