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Crooked News Network

A new hire for CNN:

Ghislaine Maxwell has been convicted on 5 counts related to sex crimes committed against minors for over a decade. A few minutes after her conviction, she announced she has landed a brand-new job at CNN.

"We called Maxwell as soon as the verdict was read," said CNN President Jeff Zucker. "Ghislaine has shown us she has exactly what it takes to work here. This has nothing to do with the fact that she's really good at committing sex crimes. We are hiring her for her... um, many other qualifications. Yeah. Qualifications."

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