Those Crazy (and Wild) Tamils
Pimping for Saddam

Not Cool, Kinda

Gene Weingarten:

I recently turned 54, experienced prostate problems, became hobbled with an arthritic knee, let my belt out a notch and noticed that when I don't shave for a week I begin to look like Santa Claus. At a moment like this, a real man knows it is time to take serious remedial action. I knew what I had to do. I had to fire a submachine gun.

Whoa.

My submachine gun was a relatively small SWAT-team favorite, an $18,000 H&K MP5 (9mm) Fully Automatic. (All machine guns have names like that. Wouldn't it be cool if American boys were given names like that, too? "I'd like to introduce you to my daughter, Amanda, and my son, S&C Ironmaster .38 Pump Action.")

Bwahaha. Read the whole thing. It's good.

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